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Apparently my childhood is being made into a movie

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So, having just heard that they’re making a movie of Eagle of the Ninth — which when I had to read it in Grade Six I though was the coolest book ever — I fully expect every other book I have ever had to read for school to be adapted to the screen, post-haste, starting with The Endless Steppe. (Boy, was that book titled accurately.)

Don’t neglect the French books, Hollywood — I can’t wait to see mustard being used as a weapon in Jeanne, Fille du Roy or a post-nuclear Montreal in Surreal 3000, or four guys slowly dying of woods-related causes because they hunted a moose illegally in Revanche de l’Orignal.

Don’t think that you’re off the hook just because I can’t remember the title of a book, either. I’m counting on seeing that one where the girl with the harelip runs away and her whole family follows her, and her little brother sees the sea for the first time and decides he wants to live there. Also the book about John Cabot where he disses spices and his mom serves him a lasagna with no spices and rancid meat. Take that, John Cabot — if that is your real name (it’s not.)

And don’t forget the books I just made up because it was easier to do that than read them for book reports. Coming in 2012: “Shakespeare’s Planet,” based on Matthew Johnson sort of skimming the back cover of the book by Clifford D. Simak and hoping his teacher hadn’t.


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